The modern ghost doesn't pull your sheets; they watch your stories
As the year approaches its end, people often look back on what they've been doing. The fall is a pretty nostalgic time for most of us. As the days get colder and we spend more time inside, we take stock of our lives, and that's when old chats and photos come into question.
We have rituals for those who passed away, but not for those who ghosted. So when we have too much time to think, ghosts might appear more alive than ever. We have to be very careful, because a second (or third) round at Ghost Town can't take us anywhere good.
Every October, we decorate our homes with ghosts. We hang white sheets from trees; we carve faces into pumpkins, and make the paranormal part of our everyday lives. We even make it funny.
But we have no rituals for those who disappeared without saying a word and continued to be the first to watch your stories forever. The relationship with those ghosts is difficult because you can always check what they're up to when you're tempted, and keep having a parasocial relationship with a supernatural presence that seems very real.
Breaking up is easier than being ghosted precisely because there is a whole ritual around it. You sit down, talk to your soon-to-be ex about why it's over, you cry, beg, send petty texts, and one day, finally catch up to the idea. When the other person just vanishes, you're left with a bunch of unanswered questions that will likely be answered with your own fantasies.
Should we totally dress up as our exes this Halloween; aren't they ghosts after all? Why are ghosts so funny when they're fictional and so terrible when they're right there, watching your stories?
In folklore, ghosts are neither fully present nor absent, just like our exes. Cultures have created long lists of rituals to 'help' them get to the other side and stop bothering us. Maybe we should use this knowledge and apply it to this type of unfinished business.
Our version of a ritual could be finally blocking them and never looking back. It's the perfect time of the year to do it if we don't want it coming back to haunt us on New Year's Eve. Remember, they always text when you least expect it; it doesn't matter if three years have gone by. And although this might sound good if you still miss them, trust me, it isn't. There is a reason why it didn't work out the first time.
Also, family-centered holidays can revive the pressure to bring someone home, or to answer questions about those who came last year. We should remember that having a relationship isn't mandatory, and forbid our aunts from asking.
Cuffing season should be about watching horror films, eating apple pies, and pumpkin-everything. Not about summoning our love life ghosts.
Let's prioritize our well-being this season and not call these entities back into our lives!