Latest in Funny
Updated 12:40 PMKittens abandoned by stray cat mom in cat lover’s garden fulfill her long time dream of pawrenting a cat child and creating a warm furever home in Cat Distribution System win: ‘The all black kitty sticks to me like Velcro.’
With all the worry, woe and despair in the world is it nice to know that a good and simple kitten rescue story still exists. The kind that you can comfortably cozy up in your comforter knowing that all will be well from …
'Baking With Paws': 21 Hardworking Cats Making Biscuits on the Night Shift at the Feline Bakery
Cats have convinced us they're mysterious little creatures, but from time to time, they reveal a very important secret... They all work at the same bakery. Nobody knows where the bakery is, who owns it, or why production…
New Comic: Children Of The Corn
Error'd: Zero to Zero in 0 seconds
"So many zeroes! I'm in." W00H000! Kivi S. "found this ad in the wild. This must be a very large jackpot, look at all those zeroes!" "I knew it!" groused an anonymous cynic. "Yes, SignUpGenius. We all know that …
Roommate takes woman’s spare car keys without permission, moves her car so friend can use her parking spot, gets it towed and leaves her with the $909 bill: ‘They didn’t even offer to help’
Borrowing someone's parking spot is one thing, but moving their car without permission and getting it towed is another. Coming home from vacation to a $909 bill was definitely not the welcome she expected. While she was …
The post No One Translated To Foreign Players Why They Currently In Cornfield appeared first on The Onion.
Retail Manager Repeatedly Warns Entitled Karen To Stop Leaving Her Car in Their Parking Lot, She Tries To Circumvent the Rules Further, Gets Towed: ‘Fine, I’ll Just Park Over There Then'
After a gas station employee repeatedly ignored a retail manager's requests to stop occupying one of the store's three customer spaces, her attempt to evade the parking signs got her towed. I think that the main problem …
28 Pawfessional Felines Who’ve Purrfected the Art of Doing as Little as Possible and Still Getting Paid
It is the dream in this life, to earn a whole bunch of money while doing little to nothing to actually earn it. Heck, it is basically the American dream that has been lost to time. But we are happy to say that the dream …
Business-owner mother-in-law refuses to give her helpless daughter-in-law a job at her company, despite her son's wishes: 'If I fire her, that would just make it worse, and I know she won’t be a good employee.'
In-laws and business just don't mix. Has someone ever asked you to help them get a job, and you instantly knew it would be a bad idea? You might love your best friend with all of your heart, but know that if they ever g…
Teenage girl at an event was screaming out loud if customers wanted to leave a tip after paying $11 for a glass of lemonade, making everyone uncomfortable: ‘If you said no to a teenage girl in front of everyone, you'd look [bad].’
Tipping culture will always be a problem When we discuss tipping culture, we always get to the same conclusion. It probably wouldn't be needed if restaurants paid their servers more than minimum wage, but it would imply …
25 Existential Cat Memes for Felines Contemplating the Meaning of Meow
"There is no means of testing which decision is better, because there is no basis for comparison. We live everything as it comes, without warning, like an actor going on cold. And what can life be worth if the first rehe…
21 Cooking Fails for Optimistic Home Chefs Learning to Trust the Process (August 8th, 2026)
Don't get discouraged by cooking fails… let's use them as fuel to laugh (and order takeout). I have a complicated relationship with cooking. I love food, I love trying new things, and I can spend way too much time watchi…
WASHINGTON—Blasting the 2-year-old’s incessant lying to the American people, White House press secretary Karoline Leavitt on Thursday slammed her toddler son over baseless accusations that the caterpillar was very hungry…
Employee asks for tips on how to deal with a coworker who constantly reports everyone else’s slip-ups: ‘They turn every little thing into a investigation, escalations and somehow remember every mistake you’ve made’
The classical 'Petty employee turned CEO' story that never occurs At some point in our careers, we've all had that one coworker who thought that if they sided enough with the management team and worked as their informant…
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Scale
Click here to go see the bonus panel! Hovertext: I started reading in population ethics recently and let me tell you there is undug philosophical gold. Today's News:
Surveillance company Flock’s automatic license plate readers, which are used by over 5,000 law enforcement agencies across 49 states, are generating controversy. The Onion examines the pros and cons of the technology. PR…
Woman finally gets her own apartment and adopts a "retired" ragdoll cat, only to find out a few weeks later she wasn't quite done being a mom
Oh, Trojan cats, what will we ever do without their surprise kitten attacks? Every child had a Greek mythology phase around elementary school age, so it means every adult learned in childhood about the Trojan horse story…
PALO ALTO, CA—Telling himself he had “no other choice” but to end the simulated character’s life himself before his company effectively pulled the plug on the virtual world, a tearful Mark Zuckerberg reportedly smothered…
MCCOOK, IL—Complaining that he couldn’t even walk down the street without being mistaken for a world-class basketball player, doughy Eastern European immigrant Vukašin Petrović told reporters Thursday that he was tired o…
Kirk Devine, 45, passed away in a hot-air balloon explosion last Wednesday. In lieu of flowers, the family asks that mourners find and return Devine’s body parts. The post Kirk Devine appeared first on The Onion.
After hearing a kitten cry beneath a stranger’s car, one couple’s late-night rescue ends with an unexpected addition to the family
Nothing ends a lovely night out quite like crawling under a stranger's car with a fistful of Cuban pork to rescue a screaming kitten. It was 10 p.m., and one couple was wrapping up a party and getting ready to head home.…
CodeSOD: Never Eating the Cookie
Maciej works as a freelancer, and that frequently means picking up old PHP code that nobody wants to support. One project had been lingering for ages with key features missing. Specifically, it was supposed to make HTTP …
Among fighting game developers, one stands out as more damp and weird than the others. Their carapace is more mottled, their palps somehow more pedi than the rest. Arc System Works! We've been fans of their fermented, pi…
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Priority
Click here to go see the bonus panel! Hovertext: Hoping this will cause someone to surface an off-brand SMBC author from the midcentury USSR. Today's News:
New Comic: Brokon
"You submitted a pull request." Indika was, in fact, reviewing the comments she'd gotten on that very same pull request, when her boss, Bill, walked up behind her. What she didn't understand is why Bill said it like it w…
My eyes have decided to stop working in low-light so I bought this necklace thing that has little flashlights at the end so I could use it for reading and doing art and last night I thought that it would probably also ma…
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Brave
Click here to go see the bonus panel! Hovertext: The only thing more overrated than truth is beauty. Today's News:
Eric O was trawling through an API for handling concurrency, and found this little mismatch between the comment and the definition: /// <summary> /// private Status, because while this object needs to be able to set the …
I think Gabe has wanted to draw Asmongold for awhile, and generally these days the thing that keeps him from doing it is that he doesn't want to draw attention to the target. Except the target in this case is one of the …
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Quantum
Click here to go see the bonus panel! Hovertext: I await your hatemail telling me I too am wrong. Today's News:
New Comic: Passionate Intensity
The Crossroads
I moved some things around on my calendar. 4:00 PM today is open. Please come to the executive floor. -Leila For a while I was stunned, staring at the email in front of me. I’d just told my boss I was quitting, refusi…
The post PostSecret TED Talk appeared first on PostSecret.
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Simulation
Click here to go see the bonus panel! Hovertext: All I'm saying is that of all the ways reality could be, you think it just HAPPENED to be real? Today's News:
Sunday Secrets
The post Sunday Secrets appeared first on PostSecret.
What Is The Ultimate Secret?
When I pulled the perfect secret from my mailbox and looked at it, I didn’t understand – it was wordless. The secrets that make the biggest impression on me are probably not what most people would expect. They can be fun…
Classic Secrets
The post Classic Secrets appeared first on PostSecret.
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Fur
Click here to go see the bonus panel! Hovertext: My first introduction to this actually really phenomenon was Acerfur. Ever after, whenever an online discussion of Lean gets too technical, I realize every avatar is in a …
The post Annual Animated Secrets Shared at PostSecret Live! Events appeared first on PostSecret.
The first panel of this strip has a joke so dumb it arrested my consciousness. I had to crank the key and turn it over several times to get it started again. Gabe bounced off Beast of Reincarnation at light speed, but it…
Error'd: Time Wounds All Heels
Looked to the past for some time-traveling entries to round out a themed post. They're 25% fresh. Robert apparently got a notification of a planned past delivery. It could be just a case of two systems that don't report …
So there’s this strange thing that happens to me where when I’m in a depression it literally affects my sight. The deeper I get into a depression the more I get literal tunnel vision, with all of the edges seeming hazy a…
So if you are a very close follower of mine you probably noticed that I disappeared here for over a week, which I don’t think I’ve ever done before. I’d like to say it’s because I was off on an exciting vacation but trut…
Jimothy
I drew a raccoon and other important updates. View on my website
So this morning I had to get up early for a doctors appointment but instead of my alarm I woke up to an incredibly loud IMMINENT THREAT flood warning and so it gave me an excuse to just go back to bed because I couldn’t …
I’m writing this now bc I don’t ever want to go a week without blogging even if -like now- I’m fighting off a depression that makes me feel more than slightly worthless. You can usually tell when I’m in a depression beca…
Scars
An oracle comic View on my website
My brain has stopped working this week so please enjoy this assortment of things that brought me joy and laughter: 2. I am a prolific reader and a bookstore owner and I just found out I have been mispronouncing Jodi Pico…
Voicemail Secrets
Visit the online exhibition of audio secrets to hear a collection of voicemails from friends, parents, brothers, sisters, partners, loved ones. Some are funny, many are brief and heartfelt. Listen here. Or upload your ow…
Finish the drawing. It is NOT a plane!
I finished it. View on my website
We need to talk about naked mole rats
This is a comic about naked mole rats, aka tube goblins. View on my website
My Dog: The Paradox - Trailer
Watch the trailer for My Dog: The Paradox, a short film about my dog. View on my website
'Wheel of Fortune' Began as 'Hangman: The Game Show'
By Amanda Mannen Published: December 25th, 2025
This Is The Most Surprising Comedian Named In Johnny Carson’s Secret Ban List
By Keegan Kelly Published: December 25th, 2025
The Hershey's Kisses 'Christmas Bells' Commercial Was a Last-Minute Improv
By Amanda Mannen Published: December 25th, 2025
15 Iconic Props From Classic Movies That Were Thrown Out Like Garbage
By Amanda Mannen Published: December 24th, 2025
The Unfortunate History of 'Jingle Bells'
By Amanda Mannen Published: December 24th, 2025
These Are The Funniest Christmas Gifts You Can Buy With Bill Maher's Face On Them
By Keegan Kelly Published: December 24th, 2025
My Dog: The Paradox - Film premiere
You're invited to the premiere of my first animated film. View on my website